What I Actually Wore #0013

Serial #: 0013
Date: 17/12/2008
Weather: It’s Dubai. The sun is shining.
Time Allowed: 30 minutes

“Just how skimpy can I go in Dubai?” I asked X before I packed for my holiday.

Don’t get me wrong: I had no desire to parade scantily-clad along the boulevards of Dubai, scandalising the local populace, defying the laws of the land, and risking imprisonment.

No. I simply had an evening dress that I bought long ago and the opportunity to wear it had not arisen so far.

“Pretty skimpy,” X replied nonchalantly. “You can wear practically anything in the hotels.” That’s where the ex-pats go in the evenings, as few places 1) allow you to wear said skimpy clothes, and 2) are licensed to sell alcohol.

“It kinda has no back,” I supplied helpfully. “Except for these criss-cross strap things. But it’s knee-length only. Not tarty at all!” I added hastily.

I had no desire to parade scantily-clad along the boulevards of Dubai, scandalising the local populace

“Sounds great,” said X. Backless? Of course he did.

So my shimmery, oyster-toned silk BCBG dress came with me.

The big night finally arrived. I was being taken out to dinner at Trader Vic’s, in Madinat Jumeirah. It was not quite the glamorous five-star hotel I had been imagining for the dress’ début – I was informed many diners went the casual route – but I was determined to wear it.

When it came down to modelling it for X, (albeit an appreciative audience) … how can I put this delicately? … the dress was found to be skimpy; at least for Dubai. (X was aghast at first sighting of my hot-pink babydoll number: “Where do you wear that back home?” he demanded instantly.) Also, I was disgusted that the weather was not living up to my expectations. I knew it wouldn’t be as hot as in summer, but I’d been hoping for more than 21°C. I needed a cover-up. Fortunately I’d already been on a shopping-spree, and my new Zara jacket was perfect.

I wore low silver sandals, one of only two pairs of evening shoes I had brought with me; a silver satin evening bag (which I had been forced to buy in Dubuy [sic] owing to the fact that I had forgotten to bring one with me); and pearl chandelier earrings that I have owned since forever.

After dressing and accessorising, all that was left was for me to enjoy the evening, starting with a Tiki Puka Puka*, a rum cocktail. We had fun, my multiple-shot rum cocktail and I, we did. Oh, and X. He was there too. He wore a suit or something.

Items:
Dress: BCBG Max Azria Runway
Jacket: Zara
Earrings: from Portobello Lane
Bag: Accessorize
Shoes: Zoe Wittner

*It must be noted that this cocktail is so enormous it does not come in any type of standard glass. It comes in a footed dessert bowl. With a gardenia floating in it. Accounts as to actual quantity seem to vary. I was told seven, but it could be three American shots… or 4.4 Australian shots…

What I Actually Wore #0012

Serial #: 0012
Date: 03/11/2008
Weather: 18°, slightly windy, cool in morning, threatening rain
Time Allowed: 5 minutes

What is the correct terminology for a hem that is turned under itself and attached to the lining? Balloon hem? Bubble hem? Cocoon? A quick search on Google turns up 'balloon hem' in reference to a Narciso Rodriguez dress on net-a-porter.com. That’s good enough for me.

There is also something strangely attractive about them. I admit, unashamedly, that I liked them the first time they came round in the 80s, when I was a teen. I had at least two incarnations, one in black and white gingham that I wore with a white t-shirt and a black corset belt, and a coral-coloured dress with white polka-dots that I still have rolled up in a drawer somewhere.

Then quite a few years ago I bought an Obüs skirt in greeny-goldy shantung silk that had a modified balloon hem, slightly twisted. And of course we all know they are back in fashion with a vengeance again! However, the dress I am wearing here – purchased at the Salvos – I would never have bought new simply because it is strapless.

I admit, unashamedly, that I liked [balloon skirts] the first time they came round in the 80s, when I was a teen

I have always hated strapless necklines with a passion – I think because I once saw a gruesome photo in the 80s of a quartet of bridesmaids all straining to catch the bride’s bouquet. Their arms and torsos reached to the heavens; their dresses stayed firmly anchored to earth, thanks very much, and all of Australia was treated to a view of their bosoms. Thank you, Cleo or Cosmo, or whichever magazine it was that published this delectation.

A top worn underneath saves the day. Featuring an asymmetrical hem, and a pretty draped neckline it complements the draped hem nicely. Discovered on the same shopping trip as the dress, the top is from the currently retired Australian label Tina Borg. I added the blue suede shoes and red enamel earrings for a shot of colour to enliven my neutral palette.

Items:
Top: Tina Borg
Dress: Barkins
Earrings: from Love It
Watch: Kenneth Cole
Sunglasses: from Bimbo
Shoes: Robert Robert

What I Actually Wore #0011

Serial #: 0011
Date: 01/11/2008
Weather: balmy evening that turned quite chilly
Time Allowed: unknown; decisions on the fly

A hen’s night out with a gaggle of girls ten years younger than me! A touch of children’s storybook in my outfit! Gadzooks! What should I wear?

A trumpet skirt in caramel leather; a silver lurex wrap top for a little sparkle; black patent heels with a 20s feel. I would have loved to wear my new lurex over-the-knee socks, but not with a matching top. I settle for vintage diamante earrings and bracelet instead, and silver sparkle eye-shadow that also dusted my cheeks as I dashed it on.

When the night turned cooler, I was glad I had brought my velvet jacket – on its first outing after hanging in my closet for more than a year. With a red leather clutch tucked under my arm, I was good to go.

And my touch of fairytale? … It’s the rose Beauty’s father stole from the Beast.

And my touch of fairytale? Well, I was going to carry a parasol in homage to Mary Poppins, but I didn’t want to be saddled with it all night. I am delighted instead to wear a leather choker from Fat; a former boyfriend had always hated it and complained if I pulled it out. It’s the rose Beauty’s father stole from the Beast.

To cap off the night we were all tickled at the sight of so many young lads drawn like bees to the honeypot, clustering around the bride-to-be!

Items:
Skirt: Saray
Top: Country Road
Jacket: Katherine
Shoes: Zoe Wittner Design
Bag: Valenti
Choker: Collins & Cerne of Melbourne
Earrings: vintage
Bracelet: vintage

What I actually wore #0010

Date: 30/10/2008
Weather: 30°, windy
Time Allowed: 5 minutes

When I was little I had a favourite blue dress that I loved chiefly for its sleeves: when I lifted my arms they arced like wings, so I called it my angel dress. Perhaps that childhood nostalgia attracted me to this pretty top with its intricate folds like origami.

I call them angel sleeves but they are sheer hell to iron!

This outfit began with the top, and I decided the soft grey needed to be teamed with something equally dulcet, and settled on an old standby, my very old Obüs skirt (the second to appear in this journal). The wonkily-shirred ‘underskirt’ of cotton voile I don’t even attempt to iron.

I pulled everything in with a leather obi – a nice cultural tie to the origami sleeves of the top.

Items:

Skirt: Obüs
Top: Veronika Maine
Obi: Witchery
Shoes: Paolo Bondini
Earrings: handmade by myself (SS and FWP)
Headband: Lady Jayne

What I actally wore #0009

Serial #: 0009
Date: 28/10/2008
Weather: rainy periods in the morning only, 20°
Time Allowed: 10 minutes

Doesn’t your heart just palpitate with delight at the sheer gorgeousness of this silk knit top? Ruched and puffed sleeves! Polka-dot bow! Beads on the bow!

It was actually my friend who picked this adorable garment out of the dross hanging in the op-shop. I immediately felt a stab of envy and contemplated a quick shove-and-grab manoeuvre. But then I remembered we’ve been friends for 20 years, and also she knows where I live.

Imagine my joy when she regretfully passed it over to me because the style of the sleeves don’t suit her broader frame. “Oh, really?” I say sympathetically. “What a shame. I suppose I could bring myself to make use of it.”

The cute velvet turban is also an op-shop find – one that a different shopping companion turned her nose up at, but which received much adulation the day I wore it.

“Prada have brought turbans back into fashion!” I say brightly, but my friend isn’t buying it.

When I got home that night, I decorated the hat with a vintage brooch made of Aurora Borealis rhinestones that I found on eBay. It was described as an abstract motif, but I think it looks like a sheaf of wheat. I paid about $15 for it; it’s the type of brooch that would set you back $90 in vintage boutiques here in Melbourne.

I wore the hat on a jaunty angle and together with the top decided I was going on a 40s kick that day. Accordingly I wore my man-style, pin-striped trousers. Soft, cream leather mules pick up the same shade in the knit.

Items:

Knit: unknown origin, but not vintage
Trousers: Miss Shop
Hat: vintage, Kama’s Silhouet, Danish-made
Brooch: vintage 50s
Earrings: pearl teardrops from Camberwell Market
Shoes: Nina Martini