SUI: Shopping Under the Influence

I rarely make grave errors in judgement when shopping these days. I am certain enough of my own style that I do not purchase things that are destined to hang on a rail, or languish in a box in my closet.

However, on one occasion I did make a mistake – so ludicrous as to be humorous – while shopping sleep deprived and in a hurry. A double whammy.

One early evening with some time to kill, I wandered into a ‘designer’ warehouse sale shop, and pounced on a pair of patent sandals in cherry red (a colour always sure to attract my attention). They literally glittered! They also were flat(ish), a rarity for me. I tried them on. They fit, and they were cute… but what was that unpleasant chemical smell?

…they were cute… but what was that unpleasant chemical smell?

I flipped them over and stared owlishly at the perfectly legible maker’s hieroglyphics for quite a long time, trying to decipher their meaning. A diamond meant leather, right?

Relegating the horrible stench as a mere bagatelle, I paid $30 for them and trotted off to meet a friend at a bar.

The next day I wondered why that awful reek from the night before was still lingering in my closet. It didn't take long to track it down to my new shoes. When I turned them over, of course I discovered they were not leather at all.

I aired them for days, to no avail – they stink to this day. I did wear them quite a few times however, and received many compliments on my gorgeous Dorothy shoes. (I always said ‘thank you’ politely and abstained from apologising for their unwholesome odour.)

And I only wore them a few times because the cheap PU (peee-ewww!) shoes broke: one of the heel tips went AWOL. Now, not only am I reluctant to flush good money after bad, but I am too embarrassed to take the stinky things to a cobbler for repairs!