Rhinestones Are a Girl’s Best Friend

If you’re going to go fake, I say, do it with panache. I am talking here, of course, about jewels – gems, brilliants, bling, whatever you may call ’em. I can never resist shiny, sparkly things (except for actual diamonds – I don’t like those; like Holly Golightly I think they are dreadfully aging).

Out with subtlety: get the biggest, boldest sparklers you can find. Heck, buy the necklace and the matching earrings too (I did). Unrealistic colours are preferable, because we’re not trying to pretend these baubles are real. They’re fun, and they provide a great pop of colour to an outfit.

Nicole Kidman’s gems for the film Moulin Rouge are actually real, designed by Stefano Canturi, all 134cts of it, and worth a bomb (with six zeros). I saw this in the jeweller’s window in Melbourne a few years ago – amazing!The proper terms for fake bling are rhinestones, or diamantes. Once, imitation jewels were called ‘paste’. Paste stones were made from a colourless and wet glass paste with a high lead content that could be moulded or cut. And originally, rhinestones were rock crystals found in the River Rhine – who knew! Inspired by their popularity, back in 1775 an Alasatian jeweller had the idea to imitate diamonds by coating the underside of cut glass stones with a metal powder. The modern counterpart is Swarovski of course. Their crystals, also coated with special metallic chemical powders, are actually crystal glass, as opposed to the cheaper and more plebeian glass without lead that commoners make do with.

At $34.99 (plus postage), these might be more affordable: Aurora Borealis Pink Elegant Bridal Wedding Crystal Chunky Necklace Set 15"–18"Here’s how to spot a fake when shopping vintage (if it isn’t clear by its sheer, exuberant size and rollicking design, see example above): paste gems have air bubbles while natural stones do not; paste feels warm to the touch, since it is a poor conductor of heat; and being relatively soft, paste gems are unable to cut ordinary glass – so don’t bother trying to scratch your initials in window panes.

If you’re hankering after some trumpery jewels of your own you could do no better than visit the aptly named eBay shop Bonny’s Glitz and Ritz.