The Killer Thongs

These shoes tried to kill me on Monday. True story. I know they don’t look dangerous. They have no heel to speak of. They look so innocent, as though they’d never stepped on an ant and crushed it into oblivion in their life.

Souvenirs from Vietnam, by Majanh Handicrafts, they are entirely made of leather. I like the simplicity of their design: elegant curves, neat stitching, natural tan leather, the thin plait for the thong, no silly dingle-dangles. They are well-made, and the soles are quite solid leather. However, this makes them inflexible, and wear has simply made the undersides even more slippery. This is what makes them so inimical. And yet they are so pretty in their extreme minimalism (sigh), so easy, and convenient! I am loathe to get rid of them.

Knowing how slippery they are, I always climb up and down stairs very carefully. But on Monday it took only one moment for the right thong to take advantage of my inattention. My foot shot out from under me and down I went.

Fortunately I was almost at the bottom and didn’t suffer any serious injury, but this incident really brings new meaning to the term ‘fashion victim’.