Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend

It’s been a while since we dropped by the Beauty Pageant Inter-Universe. High time to correct that omission. I would be delighted to introduce you to Misses Mecury (Chris Manroe, a fiercely patriotic pilot), Zerod (White TDove, her fair beauty belies her humble origins) and Comet (the dazzling, ineffably virtuous Diamond Jack).

By this time I was letting my imagination run riot, and the sky was not the limit. Having run out of planets in our own humble solar system, I was happily making up names for planets, new cereals, rearranging the reproductive cycles of entire populations, and creating an innovative cuisine entirely based on precious stones. Diamond and peridot drink anyone? It complements the topaz pie wonderfully.

It is the fair Diamond who takes home the prize though: she was awarded two blue ribbons and one red by the judges. Not by me however – she was a trifle insipid for my tastes.

Tune in next time to meet Misses Starr (a properly ethereal princess and part-time star), Moon (a Lunarite with wanderlust and a decided want of sartorial taste) and Amazon (a singularly capable-looking young princess with the bucolic name Edith May). Bet you can’t wait.