The Secret Sock Advantage

I have long been an advocate of stay-up stockings and over-the-knee socks in preference to other winter leg coverings. You don’t have to haul them up and down when you go to the bathroom, and you avoid crotch-rage when those old tights that have seen better days sag infuriatingly.

But there is another, hitherto-undiscovered advantage to socks, I discovered the other day: when you get too hot, you can easily roll them down under your desk to cool off! However, I would recommend keeping this aberrant behaviour strictly under-cover; and really, I don’t think you could get away with doing this with stay-up stockings, even under the desk. What if you had to rise suddenly? On the other hand (leg?), you can easily pull your socks up quickly.

Photos: April 2017

Le Gendarme Avec Charme

Say bonjour to le gendarme Patrice! Normally he is not a gendarme, but a philanthropy manager at the theatre I work at. But yesterday he visited my desk and his eyes popped out with excitement when he saw my vintage Prada hat sitting on the table. “Can I try that on?” he begged, and as soon as he donned it, he was transformed.

He was already wearing an outfit bought entirely in Europe on his last trip: a Breton striped top from Merci in Paris, navy trousers from Philippa K in Denmark, shoes bought in Zurich, and a watch he adores from Larson & Jennings in NYC, but the crown of it all transformed him into a Gallic gendarme, with charm. Aptly, for the jet-setter he is, he poses by a poster of The New Yorker. Très stylé!  

Hands Across the Table

A friend and I went shopping in a vintage bazaar recently, and one of the items I came across that delighted me was this little 1930s manicure set in the green so typical of that era. It instantly put me in mind of the classic Carole Lombard and Fred MacMurray comedy Hands Across the Table (1935). Lombard plays a manicurist in the film, and she is wonderful, full of charm and biting wit. Her wardrobe is fantastic too of course.

I was tempted to buy this set, but I held back because I wouldn’t know what to do with half the tools, and the case was a bit dilapidated. So I contented myself with photographing it. Underneath is The Book of Kisses, full of literary quotes (I did buy that), and in the background a quaint watered silk doily press. (It amuses me that such an item even exists.) The silk was a shattered and stained, but retained a shabby beauty.

One can’t buy everything that appeals in a vintage bazaar, but it is so much fun looking.

What Would Coco Think?

These astonishingly ugly shoes by Chanel are so hideous they belong on the fat feet of Cinderella’s sisters. Particularly the clunky, clumsy hessian bag mules with the abomination of a cheap token flower nailed on the side. I’ll go one further and say these monstrosities belong on the hooves of Shrek’s troll wife. Or is that being unfair to Princess Fiona?

The other pair is almost as frightful. From the heel they are solid, staid cream Mary-Jane hybrids that unexpectedly finish in a delicate thong. Why, why? The balance is all wrong! When would you sport such odious footwear?

Clearly the original owner did not sport them anywhere, as they remain in pristine condition straight from the bandbox. She chose instead to donate them to a Salvos op shop – a charity thrift store – and just look at what they had the temerity to charge for them!

These astonishingly ugly shoes by Chanel are so hideous they belong on the fat feet of Cinderella’s sisters.

I take issue with the staff of charity stores who show zero discernment when pricing items. Cheap high street stores such as Zara are often racked with ‘designer’ items, while actual designer items are either priced ridiculously highly if they are well-known, or at a pittance if they are obscure (although I shouldn’t complain about the latter). The quality of the design and materials is often ill-considered.

I actually mentioned these shoes in the comment section of one of Salvos Stores’ Instagram images, and I was pleased that one of their marketing team contacted me about them within an hour. They clearly were not happy that these shoes had been priced so high and intended to send an area manager to the store in question – which is certainly maintaining good PR.

My sister Star spotted these shoes and sent the snaps to me last September. I did search online for them, wondering if the hideous mules were genuine, but it seems they were. Unfortunately I’ve lost the urls, but I recall one blogger reviewer who was scathing of them, anda second who fell in love with them and bought them, finding it difficult to choose between colours.

I must admit I am not a big fan of Lagerfeld’s Chanel, finding a lot of his output horribly frou-frou and twee (not, ahem, tweed). Considering her oft-quoted maxim of taking one thing off before she left the house, I often wonder what would Coco think of it?

A Tan for Summer

I have always loved a good, strappy Roman sandal, probably because I was brainwashed at about five years of age when it was part of our summer school uniform at my primary school. I remember in the 80s as a young teen I had a white pair, which, because I was in the sun a lot in those days, left very amusing tan marks all over my feet.

These days I stick to classic tan, which are for me the perfect casual summer sandal as they go with everything. In the somewhat Romanesque setting of a heritage house in Sydney (above), I am wearing a pair that were punctured in a brogue style; I loved them. But alas, they died, and their successor was this thong pair with contrast hot pink stitching on the toes.

At the close of this last summer, I had to regretfully bin the second pair too, for the soles had come apart and were beyond repair. It was time to hunt around for their replacement. I found them a few weeks ago, a strappy, woven leather pair. I’ve already worn them once, though I found it more comfortable to tie them in front for ease of walking. Okay summer – I’m ready for you now!

~

Read more about the origin of Roman sandals here.