What is Elegance?

Lift that chin! Taken in Sep 2008, this picture has a little spirit of vintage elegance about it. 1950s vintage headpiece, Veronika Maine top.I have been pondering this question for a long time: what is elegance? The answer could fill a book (and has), but I shall try to be briefer, although I’d like to consider these three concepts: elegance, style, fashion; and elegance as it pertains to aspects of ourselves other than our attire.

Is elegance different to style, to being fashionable?

Of course. When I was a teen, I did not understand elegance, per se, and I did not have my own style. I merely wore what was in fashion. In my early twenties, when I went to art school, I really started developing my own style – inspired by like-minded people; my studies; and the creative, eclectic district of my school. I don’t know when I started to think about elegance. Perhaps it was something I absorbed during my childhood, observing my older sisters; or perhaps it was in response to my various environments, and the behaviours of the people around me as I matured.

‘Elegance is refusal’, said Coco Chanel.

I am certain that something changed when my own style evolved in my late twenties: I moved on from the arty, ‘boho’ (how I loathe that word) look that was a relic of art school, to a type of minimalism that was yet not too Puritan. I wore simple, clean shapes but chose interesting fabrics, colours and textures.

Coco Chanel, 1936. Ph: Lipnitzki‘Elegance is refusal’, said Coco Chanel. She also advised us to look in the mirror and take one thing off before we left the house. (Going by what some people wear on the streets these days I suspect they don’t look in the mirror at all!)

The OED defines the word elegant as ‘graceful and stylish in appearance or manner’; style as ‘a particular way … procedure by which something is done; a distinctive appearance’ etc; and fashion as ‘a popular, or the latest style of clothing, hair, decoration or behaviour’.

The word ‘graceful’ is an important one: graceful in manner, in movement, in speech. When I think of elegance, I often picture women of the 1930–1950s. Not only historical photographs and films of the period (just take a look at Audrey Hepburn) but modern films set in these times, such as Gosford Park*. Why this period? Surely they don’t have a monopoly on elegance?

(Left) Two 1930s women dressed for a garden party. Ph: Alfred Eisenstaedt. Image from life.com.Perhaps not, but they did believe strongly in good manners. I don’t think you can ever be truly elegant if you are vulgar and rude to the people around you. Not the most beautiful face or careful dressing will hide bitchiness, selfishness, and all kinds of unattractive character traits forever. You will be remembered however – no matter how plain – if you are gracious, kind, a good listener … and ‘sugar and spice, and all other things nice’!

The other thing about these elegant women of the early half of the twentieth century was posture. They stood tall – or as tall as they could. This is one of the easiest and cheapest ways to achieve a little elegance: stand up straight and your clothes – no matter their origin – will hang better, and your figure will be remarkably improved. Hold your head high – yet not so high that you look unapproachable. I once received the loveliest compliment from a man: “There was something in the way you walked, the way you carried yourself – whenever we were meeting I loved to watch your arrival.” How extraordinary I felt to hear that!

Hold your head high – yet not so high that you look unapproachable.

One of my all-time favourite fashion images. ‘Charles James Gowns, Vogue, June 1948′ Ph: Cecil BeatonIt did help that many of these women (the upper class lasses) went to finishing, or deportment schools. Nowadays we have to rely on old movies, and books – or, if we’re lucky – our families, friends and mentors who set an excellent example.

Here’s an inspiring excerpt from How to be Lovely: The Audrey Hepburn Way of Life (Melissa Hellstern) to read before you click and buy. Some other books on the subject: The Penguin Book of Etiquette: The Complete Australian Guide to Modern Manners (Marion Von Adlerstein); Manners (Kate Spade); Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour, Freshly Updated (Judith Martin).

Next time on Sit Like A Lady, I’ll tackle the extremely important subject of CLOTHES!

(Left) Wenda Rogerson, Vogue 1951. Ph: Norman Parkinson. (Right) Audrey Hepburn. Ph: unknown.*Please note I do not advocate their mean-spirited behaviour!

Stylish Steps

It is not difficult to be stylish. Even just a little bit of effort goes a long way.

A case in point: this morning I saw a young woman, wet hair hanging limply to her shoulders and her fringe skinned back. Not a scrap of makeup adorned her pale face; and the dreary grey of her ill-fitting, non-descript suit did nothing to improve her complexion. She looked as unhappy and grey as the weather.

Yet her problems are so easy to remedy.

1. Never underestimate the importance of a good haircut – or hairstyle. By the latter I mean styling hair variously, eg, high ponytails, French twists, chignons etc. Another excellent idea is to apply a comb to it occasionally.
2. Wear some makeup. You don’t need to go out in full battle regalia, but perhaps some under-eye concealer and blush. They are of particular assistance in suspected case of unflattering clothing shades. Optional extras: mascara and lippie.
3. Add an accessory!* Or two, or even three. (You have to wear shoes anyway, so they don’t count.) But don’t go overboard. Remember what Coco said: “Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off.”

In the case of the young woman mentioned above, a colourful scarf** would have gone a long way to improve her look; maybe even a coloured bag and shoes. Not to mention drying her hair.

And what you don’t wear is as important as what you do: try to leave the scowl at home.

* Want more on accessories? Look here.
** Need to know how to tie a scarf? Look here.

Essential Beauty Tips I

I am sure you have read umpteen magazine articles on how to correctly apply foundation, but, inspired by my observations on the street, I feel it is high time for another lesson. The magazines are obviously behind with current trends.

Firstly, apparently you are supposed to choose a foundation that most closely matches your skin. This is rubbish!

None of this swiping of three colours along your jawline and actually going out into daylight armed with a mirror. What a waste of time. Your best course of action is to go directly to the supermarket and purchase a cheap liquid foundation – preferably one that is securely wrapped in plastic packaging so that you cannot check the colour at all.

Now, when it comes to applying your makeup, the aim is to create an artificial mask, so that every trace of humanity has been utterly obliterated. After all, skin – the body’s largest and ugliest organ – needs oxygen to thrive, and we want to clog its pores as much as possible. So cake that foundation on at least 2–3mm thick. Don’t worry about running out of makeup in a week: remember, it’s from the supermarket and cheap to replenish regularly.

The other very important technique to perfect is that of finishing with a hard line. Do not, under any circumstances, blend the makeup into your jawline. There must exist a clear demarcation of colour between your face and your neck (see illustration above).

And don’t forget that natural glow! It too must be eradicated. Here, mineral powder is your friend. Apply it with a lavish hand.

And with that, you’re all set – literally and figuratively.

~

In next week’s Essential Beauty Tips we are going to tackle the difficult question of lip liner.

Sit like a lady!

This was always one of my mum’s favourite admonitions when I was growing up. (What this says about my apparent propensity for lounging vulgarly I do not like to mention.) “Sit like a lady!” she would exclaim whenever she saw me lolling on a couch – or at the table, heaven forbid. She was particularly horrified if I was wearing a skirt or dress, and my legs were spread wide.

Unsurprisingly, it was my own comfort that was of paramount importance in my mind. It was merely an expression of the utter relaxation one felt upon returning home from school; or from completing some other exhausting task, such as watering the garden, or ironing dad’s boxer shorts. There was no-one around to observe my inelegance.

…sitting straight with one’s shoulders back – chin up – will always bestow elegance.

Except my mum of course. (My next-oldest sister hardly counted – she had no qualms against photographing one exiting the toilet, so she certainly held no pretentions to elegance herself). There were other crimes of manners to which my mother objected vociferously, such as guffawing so much one could see one’s fillings, or picking at food with one’s fingers at the dinner table. One risked a whack on the fingers with a serving spoon if caught doing that, and a homily on the traditional use of cutlery. (That was my sister; naturally I never behaved like a peasant at the dining table.)

Now I’m quite grown-up I see the benefit of sitting up straight. Not only is good posture actually good for one, but sitting straight with one’s shoulders back – chin up – will always bestow elegance. One may not be wearing the most expensive clothing, or designer sunglasses, but an elegant carriage will always catch an admiring eye. And it costs nothing except a little effort.

I do recall once when I was a teenager an acquaintance of mine watching me with a sneer as I disposed myself comfortably into an armchair, tucking my feet carefully under me so there was no hint of knickers showing. She spitefully accused me of trying to be posh. It makes me smile now; if only she’d known that I owed it all to my mother’s constant harangues!

These days I hardly ever sprawl in company… and never in a skirt. Thanks, mum.

Happy Mother’s Day.